I am a single mom. Many years ago my husband died from a terrible
disease. I have 5 beautiful children, ages 1, 3, 6, 7, and 10. We struggle but we make ends meet. We live off food stamps and the kids have a medical card. I don’t have any other family to help out so it’s just me and the kids. I have not been feeling well so I have not been able to work. I went to the doctor and my fears became reality. I too have that terrible disease. The doctor said I may only have a year to live. I don’t have insurance or a job so I can’t afford the medication I need to live. I have seen it before so I know what to expect. The last days of life are horrible and scary. I don’t want my children to watch me pass away. Who will come get them after I’m gone? Will they know what to do? Who will take care of them when I die? Will someone take advantage of them? Will they be sold into slavery? My heart is heavy and my soul cries out for help.
There is only one thing I can do. I must make arrangements for my children, to protect them. I want to make sure they are feed, safe, and loved. What will people think? Will they look down on me for making this decision? I have to do this! This is not about me but my children. I love them so much. I don’t want them to see the suffering of this disease. I don’t want them to have to care for me as I die in their arms.
I did it. I called the social services office. They are going to find my children a home with a mother and father who can love and care for them. I am torn between grief and joy. I will miss them. They are my life, my joy. Yet, I am so happy that they will be safe and happy. I love you my beautiful children.
I have been thinking a lot about the mothers who relinquish their children for adoption. There is a lot of controversy about this concept of relinquishment. I am not going to debate the wrongs and rights of relinquishment.
My heart hurts for these mothers. They know the alternative for their children so they make one last selfless act. They make sure that their children have a future. That they are safe. As I was writing this story I put myself in her shoes. What would I do in this situation? Honestly, I would make the same choice. I am grateful that I will probably never have to make that decision. I have the support of my husband, my extended family, and friends. I am truly blessed!!
Just wanted to share what I am thinking about this morning.