A Typical Night in our Home

Last night I had all the kids asleep by 8:00p.m. It had been a busy weekend and they were exhausted. Then like clockwork Faith woke up crying and coughing around 8:30. This happens almost every night. I grab her out of bed(before she wakes the entire house with her crying) and take her to my bedroom. I have to turn on the lights, stand her in the floor and talk in a loud voice to wake her up good. Her dreams always have something to do with monkeys. Still have not figured that one out. Once she calms down I give her a drink and off to bed again. Sometimes this will happen 1 or 2 more times before midnight, then she will sleep through the night.

If I remember correctly Gabriel was also up two times before midnight last night. We assume he is also having nightmares. We are never able to get him to tell us what is wrong. He is obviously upset and disoriented when he wakes. A few hugs and a drink and he is back in bed.

I think I went to bed around 11:00. Shortly after that Jacob started crying. I held him until he went back to sleep. Back to bed again but not for long. Probably 30-45 minutes later Jacob was up again. We went back and forth doing this about 3 times then I just decided to sleep on the couch. He has a cold and has a really hard time breathing at night so I slept holding him in the recliner the rest of the night.

Surprisingly, Ethan did not get up last night. Ethan, our biological son, is 4 years old and I can count on one hand the number of nights he has slept through the night since he was born.

Jacob was up by 6:00a.m and Faith by 6:30. The fun begins AGAIN!!!

Being "REAL"

The Holy Spirit must really be on the move and doing some big stuff. Just in the last couple of days I have heard several people mention the need to be "REAL". It is crazy, the last two days I have really struggled with the fact that I feel like I always need to have on the happy, everything is great face. Well, I hate to brake it to you but everything is not always happy and great at my house. LIFE IS HARD and this week has been very trying. I think many times I feel the need to keep things private because of the people who like to say, "you brought it upon yourself" or "maybe you have gotten in over your head".

Honestly, I am tired of trying to be the perfect mom, wife and keeper of my home. It is exhausting!! I am just me, a child of God, who just wants to do what God has called me to. I want to love my husband the best I can. I want to train up my children in the ways of our Heavenly Father. I want to support and minister to my friends and neighbors. I want to care for the least in my community and across the world. I just want to be who God created me to be. I DO NOT want to be "perfect" in the eyes of the world but I AM "perfect" in the eyes of MY CREATOR.

So, that being said the next couple of days I am going to get "REAL" about life in our home. BUT I also want to make sure that I say even though I am exhausted, frustrated, and sometimes feel beaten down I would not change my life for anything. God created me for "such a time as this". He did not create me to live a comfortable, easy life without trials and troubles. I am not throwing a pity party for myself and I don't want sympathy. I just want everyone to know the "REAL" me and my "REAL" life.

GOD IS GOOD ALL THE TIME

This is what happens when mommy leaves the room. Who knew two little boys could make such a mess in such a short period of time!!

Family Picture

I love to watch him sleep, relaxed and peaceful.

As I watch him sleep I dream about "his perfect body" he will some day have in Heaven. I can picture him running through tall green grass and swimming in a lake.

As I watch him sleep I grieve for him. While he sleeps is the only time his little body can relax. When he is awake he has to constantly fight against his body to make the smallest movement.

As I watch him sleep I pray for him. I pray for a miracle.

As I watch him sleep I praise God for creating him.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIRANDA & GRACE

This week we are celebrating the birthday's of my two big girls. Miranda turned "8" and Grace turned "10".

That's right Grace is "10". Our paperwork listed her at age "7" which we knew was not correct. Grace says that she is "9". The bone scan we had done says that she is between the ages of 10 and 11. So we are going to make her just turning "10" years old. We will be changing her birth year when we complete her US readoption.

HAPPY "8TH" BIRTHDAY MIRANDA

AND

HAPPY "10TH" BIRTHDAY GRACE

Prayer Request

We have come to a point in life where we need to make some BIG decisions. God has given us a heart for orphans and children with special health needs. My heart is aching right now. According to our home study agency we have outgrown our home. They will not be able to approve us to adopt more children until we have a larger home. Honestly, I have to agree with them but what's a girl to do on a fixed budget. My heart is big but my wallet is not.

So here is my prayer request . . .

We need a home with at least 5-6 bedrooms and at least 3 full bathrooms. We have a child in a wheelchair so the house needs to be handicap accessible. Our current home is not handicap accessible so when I first started thinking about handicap accessibility I just thought "no stairs". Then, when I started thinking about our son's future and his ability to participate with the family my viewpoint changed. NOW, handicap accessibility is much, much more. The hallways and doorways need to be wide enough for his wheelchair. The bathroom large enough to get his wheelchair in and turn around. The house needs no carpet so he can use his walker. These are just the basics and absolute necessities. I am sure there are more but I can't think of them right now. There are many other things that would make life easier BUT life is not able being easy so I won't go there. I don't want my own selfish desires to sneak in.

I am not sure how and when God will provide but I have confidence that he is not finished with our family. Thanks for your prayers. I can't wait to see the miracle God provides.

GOD IS GOOD ALL THE TIME



We finally have a picture of all the kids KINDA looking all in the same direction!